Monday, February 21, 2011

The Eddy of Guilt - Part I

My first Kayak was made by the company, Eddyline. I wasn't really sure what the name represented until I read more.

An eddy is actually a reverse vortex produced by the void behind an object, which is standing in moving water. The eddyline is that boundary between the water moving downstream, the intended direction, and the water moving in reverse, being pulled by the void. It is a good place to play and rest while in a kayak.

But I was thinking about guilt a lot lately and how it is like an eddy, creating a vortex around the objects that appear in natural flow of your life. I suffer a lot from guilt. My acute guilt right now is my leaving a job I've been in for eight years and one of my bosses has now become pissed about it (once it soaked in). But I've done nothing wrong. I had to beg him to hire me. I took a big cut in pay to take this job, and my boss hasn't treated me very well during the time I've been in this job. But that's not the point. The point is how guilt can dominate us so easily, robbing us of the joy we could otherwise have. I made the comment once to a Christian friend that we have too much guilt, after all, Satan IS the great accuser of the believers. He looked shocked and said the real problem is that we don't have enough guilt because Christians still sin a lot, especially these days.

Guilt is also a fabulous tool for getting what we want and for driving other people to meet our needs like driving cattle with a cattle-prod.

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