Tuesday, November 25, 2008

Butterflies in the Belfry . . . Dragons in the Dungeons - Please Help With My Manuscript

It was a hot August night in 1988 and the air was filled with Sahara dust and soy smoke. Three of us were sitting around a bamboo table in a Chinese restaurant, near Cairo’s city center. With a few poignant words shared over a lukewarm dinner of sweet and sour chicken, my entire Christian persona began to crumble. Before the night was over, my whole Evangelical universe had collapsed. I had been an Evangelical for fifteen years at that point, a Navigator for ten. By dawn, I was flirting with my old atheism.

I spent the subsequent decade and a half trying to unravel what happened to me on that infamous night. I was a driven man to know why and I searched with an intense honesty. Why had my faith failed me? Surely that night was only the breaking point of a process that had begun long before. Could I ever find God again? Could I understand what ailed my faith and continues to haunt American Evangelicalism?

It has taken me two long years to put into words the story of this incredible fifteen year journey. My discoveries about myself, human psychology, church history and philosophy were nothing short of profound. Anyone that feels uneasiness with the Evangelical Church, or their own faith, will be enlightened. In the next twenty-one postings (twenty-two if you include the Introduction) is the accumulation of those years of study, meditation and hard work.

I’m posting my manuscript here and I am asking you to read it and to comment on it. I hope to publish it because I really believe that it is too important of a story not to be told. Before I even start the arduous process of getting a publisher’s eye, I need your help. Your honest feedback chapter by chapter would be greatly appreciated. At the bottom of the page, click on "older posts" to continue.

tags: Evangelicalism, Church history, Christian Dualism, Christian Psychology, Doubt, Christian Doubt, Disillusionment with God, Disillusionment with the Church, Faith and Reason, True Spirituality, Spiritual Abuse, Plato, The Navigators, Failed Missionary experiences, Post Evangelical, Emerging Church,Blue Like Jazz, Gnostics, Gnostic Christianity, Platonic Christianity


JUSTIN said...


Good stuff. I have read up to about Chapter 6. I think this is something you need to continue to pursue. Stories like this need to be told, even if it seems like no one will listen, or hear.

While I came from a childhood which was not quite as "compartmentalized" as you describe, what you write resonates with my experiences of being lost in the traditional church. Thank you for being willing to share.

MJ said...

Thanks for your comments. Yeah, it is really hard to tell stories in an honest light . . . everyone, almost everyone, likes to read the real success stories.

Anonymous said...


Read and replied to your comment on IMonk's blog. Just read a couple chapters of your book. Holy Crap, dude. Its a miracle that you are still in the faith. That Navigator's guy that stranded you in Egypt is a dangerous sociopath. God will repay him for what he has done. I wish you lived closer, I would invite you to one of our Saturday night parties where we drink and smoke cigars, discuss theology and our failures and blessings - no holds barred. If there is anything I can do to lend a hand,let me know. Also you can contact me at www.newreformationpress.com and if there is anything in our catalog you would like I'll send it to you for free.

Patrick Kyle