I wish I had time to write and to think. I came up for air a few weeks ago. That brief respite lasted only about ten days before my medical practice entertained wave after wave of crises (oddly either too many patients needing help or too little insurance payments and bankruptcy looming). The past two weeks have been especially hard. I think I spent over 70 hours with work last week and this week will be about the same. I only have time to write this morning because I had one patient cancel. But then after driving 30 miles north to see patients, I must turn around after work and drive 140 miles south to a meeting then back home just in time to pack for Turkey.
Tomorrow I leave for Istanbul. The goal for me personally is to deepen my personal desire to know world history, the history of the church, new cultures and to spend time with my kids. I have the opportunity to take all of them with me.
In my studies leading up to this point, I've discovered so much more about the thinking of Hellenistic Christianity.
I've also decided to meet with a psychologist. In my Evangelical days I would never have considered it. But the stress that I've been under, compounded with my pre-existing tendency towards anxiety, I thought it would be worthwhile. In my old way of thinking I would have demanded that she be a "Christian Counselor." The worst counsel I've ever received was from "Christian Psychologist." Now my litmus test is "Cognitive." I don't respond to "finding that energy field of the universe to heal your infant soul" crap. For example, last night she suggested that I seriously give up my practice because of its toll that it is taking on my life. That is rational. My meeting in Seattle tonight is possibly closing a deal to sell my practice and make me an employee to get me out of this ownership whirlwind.
I will stop typing now because when I type in a rush, like I'm doing here, I, invariably make a lot of typos that are an embarrassment later. Pictured above is the great Sophia Hagia. It was the greatest building on planet earth for over a thousand years . . . maybe even today. It was the largest church on the planet for most of the existence of Christianity. It was dedicated to wisdom or knowledge. The same wisdom that Solomon (my Biblical hero) alluded to. Knowing is wonderful. It is a shame that the Church has spent too much of its energy over the past 2,000 suppressing knowledge.
I know that this is a strange twist in what I was writing about . . . but then again, maybe not. I watched a Frontline story a couple of weeks ago about sexual abuse within the Catholic Church. I am not a Catholic hater as some of my Evangelical friends have been. I believe in the exposure of truth in any church.
But in the Frontline show I watched one interview that deeply disturbed me. It was with a lady (now in her 30s or 40s) who described what had happened to her. When she was a little girl the priest had her come into his office. To cut to the chase, he raped her on his desk. She was totally confused as she had no idea what sex was or what had just happened to her. But as hideous as this was, what came next, in my opinion, was even worse. The priest stood up, zipped up his pants and said to her, "You have sinned and you need to find forgiveness for what YOU have done. If you don't or if you tell anyone of your sin, your whole family may burn in hell."
She came out of his office confused, in physical pain not to mention horrible emotional pain. She went to the basin of holy water and washed the blood off her shorts. She felt so much shame and guilt for the rest of her life.
This priest? It is for people like him that I do believe in hell. It only makes sense as a containment for such evil.
This priest was protected by his church and for too, there is hell awaiting.
Tomorrow I leave for Istanbul. The goal for me personally is to deepen my personal desire to know world history, the history of the church, new cultures and to spend time with my kids. I have the opportunity to take all of them with me.
In my studies leading up to this point, I've discovered so much more about the thinking of Hellenistic Christianity.
I will stop typing now because when I type in a rush, like I'm doing here, I, invariably make a lot of typos that are an embarrassment later. Pictured above is the great Sophia Hagia. It was the greatest building on planet earth for over a thousand years . . . maybe even today. It was the largest church on the planet for most of the existence of Christianity. It was dedicated to wisdom or knowledge. The same wisdom that Solomon (my Biblical hero) alluded to. Knowing is wonderful. It is a shame that the Church has spent too much of its energy over the past 2,000 suppressing knowledge.
I know that this is a strange twist in what I was writing about . . . but then again, maybe not. I watched a Frontline story a couple of weeks ago about sexual abuse within the Catholic Church. I am not a Catholic hater as some of my Evangelical friends have been. I believe in the exposure of truth in any church.
But in the Frontline show I watched one interview that deeply disturbed me. It was with a lady (now in her 30s or 40s) who described what had happened to her. When she was a little girl the priest had her come into his office. To cut to the chase, he raped her on his desk. She was totally confused as she had no idea what sex was or what had just happened to her. But as hideous as this was, what came next, in my opinion, was even worse. The priest stood up, zipped up his pants and said to her, "You have sinned and you need to find forgiveness for what YOU have done. If you don't or if you tell anyone of your sin, your whole family may burn in hell."
She came out of his office confused, in physical pain not to mention horrible emotional pain. She went to the basin of holy water and washed the blood off her shorts. She felt so much shame and guilt for the rest of her life.
This priest? It is for people like him that I do believe in hell. It only makes sense as a containment for such evil.
This priest was protected by his church and for too, there is hell awaiting.
